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When I confronted her, she went berserk and told me I was the one was had been lying the whole time. There’s nothing quite like being accused of being a hoax by a clinically insane human being to really rattle your nerves.
For months afterwards, my trust issues were limitless.
On dates, I’d question women and cross-examine them, fearing they weren’t telling me the truth.
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For forever and ever, she claimed, she pronounced her name “Lane-uh,” explaining that her mother had been calling her both “Lee-nuh” and “Lane-uh” her entire life.
After every single one of her friends and family refused to call her “Lane-uh,” I asked her brother what the deal was.
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The more I learn about this girl, the less sense it’s all starting to make. I was born in 1991.” I choked down my bite of pancake. Lena told me more about her life: the boys she dated, the adventures she’d been on, the places she’d lived, and the jobs she’d had.For anonymity’s sake, I’ll refer to her as Lena, because I don’t know anyone named Lena and I highly doubt Lena Dunham is reading my article under her quilt made of hundred dollar bills.I met Lena at work and it was dirty, ravenous lust at first sight.Lena and I headed back to my conveniently empty apartment with a bottle of wine, six-pack of PBR, and two copies of “Face/Off” and proceeded to get absolutely spooky with each other all night long.I asked her about her life: She told me she was almost 20, went to a prestigious, Ivy League school, which we shall refer to as Shmarvard, and had just completed a month-long mission to Africa.
As the weeks went on, we started seeing each other every day.